I’m a career girl from the start. I began with magic shows that I made my parents pay to watch while interrupting their favorite TV show for my impromptu performances. Thank goodness they were good sports.
Then they closed in our balcony, but never finished the room, so it became my first store. My mom had a running balance, I sold anything you could make out of paper, crayons and scraps from the lumberyard (my family ran a lumberyard.) It was called Diamond Nerds; “nerd” had just become the new it-word and I thought it the most clever name ever. I worked every day during the summer: inventing new product, forcing my family to shop for more paper items and merchandising my eclectic mix.
I had dolls, but spent more time making clothes or furniture for them than playing mom. I had the best dressed and home-furnished Barbie’s in town. I was given all the outdated wallpaper books from the store, I wallpapered box after box making huge homes filled with matching wallpapered blocks of wood furniture with dolls in matching wallpapered outfits and purses, too much? Never!
It was clear: I was meant to be an entrepreneur, a hard-working business woman, a fashionista, a designer, an artist and even in the theatre…but a mom? Are you kidding? I spent most of my life saying I’m never having children. But now that I’ve become pregnant and gotten used to it, I’m not only embracing it; I’m thrilled beyond belief and have figured out a few things, though I know I’ve just touched the tip of the iceberg. Here’s what I’ve learned so far.
1. They’re not kidding, EVERYTHING changes when a baby comes into the picture. She’s not even here yet and just about everything in my life has changed. Things I’ve tried to accomplish for 30 years, I’ve been able to reach in the past 6 months…for her. I want to be the best mother ever and that means getting my life in order. I think the no-drinking has a lot to do with it, but I’m more productive than I’ve ever been. Getting things about our business going that I have wanted to do for years, going back to school to learn the things I’ve been putting off for years, reading all the books I always wanted to and never did, and trying to figure out how to raise a baby at the same time! I thought my life was fun and interesting before, it’s crazy and fast and full of excitement for what’s to come right now and all I can think about it getting more prepared.
2. Homebody doesn’t even begin to describe it. I used to think whenever a friend got pregnant that they fell off the earth…I feel as though I have! I’m so focused on getting everything ready that I haven’t seen or talked to friends in months. Thank goodness for facebook, I can scan every one’s updates and at least know a little of what’s going on in the world outside of my baby bubble!
3. Our society has made people scared to death to tell a woman she’s gained weight. I get told everyday, “You’re so small, you haven’t gained any weight.” This is perplexing; I’ve gained 20 pounds, even my doctor has told me to lay of the Frito’s. And I would hope that people can tell the difference between me now and what I used to think of as a pretty decent body. But I think we’ve been ingrained with the notion that weight is bad, even when it’s a good thing. Note to everyone: it’s ok to tell a pregnant woman she’s big, as a girl who’s been on Weight Watchers for about 6 years, it’s kind of nice to be able to gain weight and not feel too bad about it!
4. There are way more books about how to be pregnant than about what to do with a baby. I feel like a pregnancy expert! I must have read 20 books at this point, but I still have not one clue what to do when we bring our little girl home…hoping it comes to us, like it did with Tulip! (comments on good books are welcome!)
5. I LOVE IT! I thought it would be awful and full of all kinds of bad side effects, and there have been some whoppers (the headaches can take a hike) but I am filled with joy about my little baby bean! No matter how bad my day is, I have my little girl there with me and that just makes everything ok. I can’t wait to meet her in person and tell her how much I love her all day every day!!!
Tell your Mom you love her! I now understand that saying, there’s nothing like a Mother’s love, it is so true. I just have black and white photos and a flutter now and then, and I’ve never loved anything more in my life.
Sorry so sappy. As Corey’s book says, it’s to be expected!
